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Tertullian, A.D. 160-240, who sought to defend Christianity against
charges of immorality had plenty to say about the practice of
“In our case, murder being once for all forbidden, we may not destroy
even the foetus in the womb, while as yet the human being derives
blood from other parts of the body for its sustenance. To hinder a
birth is merely a speedier man-killing; nor does it matter whether you
take away a life that is born, or destroy one that is coming to birth.
That is a man which is going to be one; you have the fruit already in
the seed (55).”

This sounds like it also implicates contraception! No doubt if we were to ask Tertullian, he would oppose contraception outright. You should see what a stickler he was on headcoverings (I Cor. 11:1-15)! More on that beloved subject of mine later!


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Kelly at Generation Cedar has put up such a wonderful post today, entitled: “Biblical Marriage: Does It Only Work If My Husband Is Nice?”

I think many Christian women struggle with this. Perhaps because of incomplete instruction on what the Bible says about marriage, but likely because of our human sinfulness and limitations. This side of heaven, we will always struggle with doing our part in Christian marriage: the unconditional respect, the submission, the selfless love commanded in God’s Word. That’s why I’m so thankful that confession and forgiveness are also commanded in God’s Word.

I have struggled with this myself, many times. But I must also say that my husband has struggled with feeling disrespected by his wife many times, so neither one of us are innocent victims. There can be rivers of hurt if a woman doesn’t feel loved by her husband, but the wonderful thing is that God already knows what we’re thinking, so He is the One we must cry out to in these times. He had compassion on Leah because He knew she was unloved by Jacob. He hears and, like my wonderful pastor says, “He is more apt to come to our aid than we are apt to ask Him for help.”

In our marriage, we’re at a wondrous stage right now. God is coming to our aid, because we asked Him for help in our desperation when our marriage had degraded into something very painful. I am stunned. I’m seeing God work in my husband in ways I despaired of ever seeing. Perhaps because it got so bad I gave up hope and gave up trying to make my husband be a certain way. I just cried and cried and cried to God. I’ve still given up, in the sense that I don’t want to go back to the striving for a great marriage that I had immersed myself in, but I’m seeing signs of new life where I thought there would only be a wasteland. When I am weak, then I am strong. I feel God’s strength doing this marvelous improvement in our marriage, because I gave up trying, and just cried out to Him.

Like the waves of the ocean will always come up continually, you can be sure that God answers prayer without fail.

[posted later: Did I just share all those private details? Oops. Blogging can be dangerous! That’s okay. I never hear people talk about having a troubled marriage until they’re planning their divorce. I know some women are desperate to hear that their Christian marriage is not the only one struggling–so they don’t feel like a misfit of some sort, and how God can bring healing. So I don’t mind being this candid.]

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So, now that I’m pregnant for the second time ever in my whole entire life . . .

(10 weeks and counting! I started showing in the first month!)

I had a very good experience with the hospital my daughter was born at: St. Joseph Medical Center in Orange, Ca. I can’t say enough good things. We were uber-blessed with a kind and gentle labor nurse who was with me from the moment I got in (I was already in the Transition Phase) till the end. My labor lasted 38 hours, but I was only in the hospital for about 3 1/2 or 4 hours (can’t remember) before she came out. I’ll have to put the birth story details on another post. Anyway, what makes me not want a hospital birth this time is just one thing: the episiotomy. This is the unkindest cut. I urged the OB in many appointments not to do this to me. He did anyway. I can understand why–I never got to 10cm dilation. But I also cried for 8 weeks because of it (that’s a wee exaggeration for effect! It hurt for 8 weeks, most of the crying was just in the first month).

So I’d love to have a homebirth with a midwife! But it’s still costly, even though my husband’s insurance will cover a good percentage of it.

So, I began looking into Unassisted Childbirth. I found Laura Shanley’s site, http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com, and became inspired! I think Laura Shanley makes a very good case for UC. Those ladies in the videos make me feel like I can do it, too! On the other hand, some fair and balanced comments from wise families on the Quiverful Digest made me realize it does have risks, and that’s coming from its advocates–families who’ve had multiple Unassisted Homebirths and know that most UC births are totally uncomplicated. I would love to have an uncomplicated UC, but at the same time, I don’t want all the pressure to be on my husband to save the day in case of an unexpected complication. He just wants to catch the baby, and that’s fine with me! We’re praying God will provide the best birthing scenario for us.

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Here is my reply to Comment #3 in my previous Prop 8 post. The person who made Comment #3 was disagreeing with my statement that, should Prop 8 fail and homosexual marriage remain legal, people would be forced to ask “are you married to a man or a woman?” when they see a wedding ring on the person’s finger. The person felt that was outlandish, because he doesn’t normally ask personal questions of any sort about the person’s spouse when he sees someone’s wedding ring on their finger. I felt my reply should be more visible, so I re-posted my comment below.

Our sex determines the terms of our existence.

At a church picnic on Saturday, I went without my husband and daughter. I was asked: “Where’s your husband?” This came from someone who knows my husband, but it didn’t have to. It may very well have been asked by one of the many people there with whom I had yet to become acquainted. Over time, with legal homosexual “marriage,” the new “morality” would begin to take hold, and people would begin to be told they’re bigoted or narrow-minded if they automatically assume a person with a wedding ring on is married to the opposite sex. This sort of thing has already made its way into our society even at the most conservative levels.

For example, Mormon missionaries (of all people!) asked my husband–right in front of me and my daughter–” . . . your wife . . .–is she your wife?” They didn’t want to look dumb just in case we happened to be one of those “co-habiting” couples who decided to raise a child together, Brangelina-style.

Another example: the public school system, where kids are being taught everyday to accept homosexuality as equivalent to homosexual “marriage,” no doubt more so now in CA now that a few judges decided that was a new “right,” by fiat, and gays are now “marrying.” So with sex ed, and in Health class, schools are basically feeling like they shouldn’t automatically *assume* a youngster was born heterosexual, so they are beginning to teach homosexual activity right alongside heterosexual activity. This is the logical outgrowth of the political correctness of “homosexual rights.”

No one wants to look like an oaf in case they might be talking to an over-sensitive person in an “alternative lifestyle,” who will pounce on them for “assuming” he’s married to a woman. “You shouldn’t jump to conclusions,” we’ll be told. “You wouldn’t want to hurt someone’s feelings,” we’ll be told. Subtle guilt.

Don’t you see how our entire language gets changed around because of political correctness? No longer stewardess, but “flight attendant.” No longer mailman, but “mail courier.” No longer fireman, but “firefighter.” People are so pliable when it comes to the ever-changing rules of political correctness. They will conform their social skills to the new homosexual political privileges sooner or later, should Prop 8 fail.

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I found this in my research on theonomy. Since I have found the articles in Chalcedon Foundation’s magazine “Faith for all of Life” so compelling, and since the leadership (notably my pastor) eschews it so clearly, I’ve decided I need to do more footwork on this. The link is below.

This article is enormously enlightening. It’s entitled “Meet the Theonomists,” and it’s written by someone FAR more familiar with theonomy and theonomists than I am. I think I’ll tread lightly in this arena. I need to keep to my husband’s leadership here, like my Titus 2 “older woman” friend always wisely admonishes me to do. The article in this link is long.


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I have always found the Bible to be totally internally consistent, as well as totally consistent with what I observed happening in the outside world and in myself. No consistency problem there. But I observed inconsistency in my church. I observed inconsistency in what my church leaders taught. Even in the “most orthodox” Bible-believing churches I sought out to attend over the course of my 17 years of being a church-attending Christian.

I did not go looking for a “new school of thought” when I came to find theonomy. I was looking for someone who would teach me how to apply Titus 2:3-5, I Timothy 2:11-15, Ephesians 5, and other passages that clearly teach a mandate for womanly purpose and womanly behavior that is VERY different from what I grew up with all around me . . . different from what I saw in the church, too! I’d see one thing about women in the Bible, and a different thing about women in church teaching and practice. I’m serious. I’m not exaggerating. So in my desire to “build myself up in the most holy faith,” and not finding help with conforming my womanhood to biblical imperitives, I had to look outside my local church leaders and church body. Even my present local church. The Titus 2:3-5 “older women” are simply very few and far between. I suspect they’re “focused on their career,” or else they’re timid. But they’re VERY needed by new moms like myself who have suckled at the breast of Feminism. Very lonely endeavor. Sad but true.

The same was true with certain parts of the Law. Especially the 4th Commandment. I have wondered about proper application of the 4th Commandment for years. I thought coming to our Reformed church from Calvary Chapel would provide teaching that would answer that for me. What I mean is, I thought I’d find sound teaching on the 4th Commandment that was as consistent with “the Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 5:17) as I found in my husband’s Puritan books. What I found at our church was closer, but still not consistent. I also thought I’d find someone else who covered her head in obedience to I Corinthians 11. No such luck. Didn’t even find anyone who felt it should be considered or discussed. But at least no one treated me like a misfit for covering my head like they did at Calvary Chapel. That’s why my husband and I felt comfortable staying where we are. Nevertheless, I’ve always been disappointed that my headcovering is such a taboo topic for discussion among the Christians at our church, when it is so obviously a peculiarity about me. I’m the only woman in church who covers her head. I stick out like a sore thumb, but I’m now way past that inner struggle where sticking out in that way makes me uncomfortable. I do it for the Lord, not to be seen by man.

I truly wish people would ask me about it. I love to share what God has taught me from I Corinthians 11. But since no one asks, I don’t go and bring it up. I wonder if I should. No doubt I’d be perceived as “pushy” and “divisive” if I did. Ironic. Bringing up certain Bible passages is considered “divisive” to certain Christians just as bringing up the exclusive claims of Christ (” . . . no one comes to the Father but by me”) is among most non-Christians. Do I see inconsistency here? You bet. Do I see hypocrisy here? You bet. Do I see a problem with the authority of God’s Word here among Bible-believing Christians? You bet. But I can’t blame them. I used to not cover my head. I used to work outside the home to the neglect of loving my husband and managing my home. I used to use contraception with my husband. I used to bristle with revulsion at “that submission bit.” But now I’m seeking to conform consistently to God’s Word in these areas. Why should it be considered “divisive” that I want to ask the church to confront these inconsistencies we have all excused?

I’ve begun to notice a few things. I’m finding the most consistency in theonomy. I’m finding a surprising opposition to it in my own Reformed Church, though! My husband and I started going to our URC church four years ago, moving there from a Calvary Chapel. Our church leadership uses the term “theonomy” as a pejorative. One time I asked our pastor to tell me what he could about Reconstructionism and R. J. Rushdoony. Our pastor chose not to answer by refuting its founder with biblical analysis, exegesis, or reasoning from the Scripture–he just calls him “Rushloony” and leaves it at that. Great. Caricature, then write him off. It was eerie. With that, he shut down all opportunity for discourse. I never expected that sort of thing from our pastor, because from the very beginning of us going there, he always made it clear that this was a church where all questions were welcome (as opposed to Calvary Chapel, where that is not the case). I didn’t want to ask him anything else then, for fear I’d be the next victim of his name-calling ridicule. So I just acted like that reply was satisfying, when it actually produced more questions in my mind. That makes me suspicious about our pastor’s confidence in analyzing the points theonomists are making.

It really makes me wonder. Meanwhile, I’m being much more “built up in the faith” (Jude 20) by the theonomy reading than I have been from any other source in a long, long time.

Don’t get me wrong. I love our church and I’ve been learning so much in the faith there. I’m still attending our church and learning a lot and enjoying fellowship there. I’m not bringing up points of contention with them, although I’ve been seriously wanting to. But I think that for me as a woman to do so would be in direct contradiction to the Biblical teaching on womanly silence. (I know I just shocked just about all of the 2 or so people reading this. But I am 100 % serious.) We’re not even allowed to ask questions in church–just of our husbands. I mean, our church has no problem with women asking questions in church–they’d scoff at the prospect of women not asking questions (another inconsistency). But if you read I Timothy 2:12 and I Cor. 14:34-35, that’s clear from Scripture. It doesn’t get more clear than that. So I have to wait for God to move my husband to bring these things up with church leadership. Even if I have to wait a long time.

Much more to come on this. Especially with regard to Biblical Womanhood, especially with regard to headship and submission.


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Don’t forget. Never forget. Seven years ago, our nation was hit hard. I will always remember where I was. It was the day before my 24th birthday. It was my first year as a teacher, the first few days on the job as Whittier High School’s new choir director. I was in the copyroom at 6:30 am, trying to get an early start to my long to-do list, making photocopies before the schoolday began. Another teacher there told me what he’d heard on the news. I was disbelieving. Then I saw it on the news. I saw the videos of the second plane hitting the second tower. The rest of the day’s teaching plans lost its purpose. For many months later, I felt my vulnerability under the sky. I imagined the same catastrophy occurring at my very location wherever I went. Everyone did. I visualized airplanes careening into Whittier High School. It was so very unexpected. 


It reminded us that we are so small. Events like those on the day of September 11th simply don’t happen without God’s permission. We get so used to His hand of protection keeping our little lives from being blown into oblivion. All He has to do is lift His hand of protection for His own Sovereign purposes, and it all can come to an end. May we pay homage to Him alone.


Many conservatives and Christians say it is to George W. Bush’s credit that we have not had another terrorist attack on US soil since then. I have felt the same way, and very strongly. But do we really think George W. Bush is in total control of things to the point of him being able to avert all terroristic catastrophe? Why have we ascribed a God-like power to George Bush, when this President was not able to protect us from the terrorist attack before September 11th? If George W. Bush deserves the credit for the lack of attacks since September 11th, then George W. Bush deserves the credit for not preventing them before they occurred, as well! I’ve been learning a little about the sovereignty of God, and I now believe only God is in total control of all things. The only one who gets the credit for the fact that we haven’t been attacked again is God Almighty. God forgive us for giving George W. Bush the glory for our safety. That glory belongs to God alone.

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